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Christmas

Escape from Christmas

(43 Posts)
MShep Sun 16-Oct-22 10:12:50

Does anyone feel like me ?

I’ve just gone through the third year anniversary of the loss of my husband after 40 years of being together. My granddaughter is with her mum this year and my son is going on a short break with his new parter (which I fully support). I don’t want to sit on my own getting depressed- I’d quite like to go away somewhere but equally don’t want to find myself miserable away from home either. I work full time so haven’t really made any new friends or joined any local groups yet. Anyone have any good ideas on ‘how to get through it’…

Kim19 Sun 16-Oct-22 10:19:57

My first Christmas alone I flew over to Paris and joined up with a coach tour group. I didn't want the arduous journey but did want to join the group and join them on all their escapades. Worked wonderfully well for me.

Anniebach Sun 16-Oct-22 10:47:10

I spend it alone, am use to it now, don’t like it but no choice,
am grateful I had so many happy Christmas’s.

Aldom Sun 16-Oct-22 11:00:04

I have a friend who goes abroad for an Art project holiday at Christmas. A far cry from Tinsel and Turkey type Christmas breaks. I usually spend Christmas with my family, but have occasionally spent the day home alone. I ate what I prefer, had treats, wine and pressies. Cosy and warm to enjoy my choice of TV programmes.
I too am widowed and have also, in recent years had the harrowing experience of losing my beloved adult son. We just have to get through Christmas as best we can. Whatever you choose to do, I wish you well. May you have peace at Christmas and in the coming year. flowers

Aldom Sun 16-Oct-22 11:03:42

Annniebach flowers flowersThinking of you too. smile

Annaram1 Sun 16-Oct-22 11:06:47

My family can't have me for Christmas this year, and were feeling guilty. So I booked a festive break with Shearings coaches and am going to spend Christmas in a nice hotel in Llandudno, with all sorts of treats including a present from Santa!

1summer Sun 16-Oct-22 11:09:14

I must admit I really do want to spend Christmas alone. My husband died 2 months ago, the grief is terrible. Lots of people keep asking me out but I really struggle to socialise. One to one I am ok but in a group I withdraw into myself. My family have lots of plans for Christmas and I know they will be upset if I don’t join in. I have a 2 year old granddaughter and I do want to spend time with her. Just be glad when its over.

Witzend Sun 16-Oct-22 11:13:54

? 1summer. I do hope you won’t be pressured into joining in anything if you don’t feel up to it.

Anniebach Sun 16-Oct-22 11:16:31

Aldom we get through it don’t we ? x

Caleo Sun 16-Oct-22 11:44:56

I get a new novel from an Amazon dealer and stock up with croissants, dairy ice cream, and ginger beer.

Caleo Sun 16-Oct-22 11:47:16

I keep meaning to learn to crochet which I view as a means to get through family gatherings within which I am no longer an interesting personage .

MShep Sun 16-Oct-22 11:51:14

All great suggestions- thank you everyone

annodomini Sun 16-Oct-22 12:01:03

I have a 'thing' about Christmas - afraid to spend it on my own. This goes back 76 years, to the Christmas when, a 6-year-old with pneumonia, I spent three weeks in hospital, isolated from my parents and sisters. I certainly got lots of presents, sent by friends and relatives, and delivered by Santa Claus, but I was alone in my room, without even the company of other children. I know it's ridiculous, but I still need to have people - preferably family - around me at Christmas. My dear family all know about my feelings and every year I am asked to spend the holiday with one family or the other.

Aldom Sun 16-Oct-22 12:48:55

Just a thought regarding COACH HOLIDAYS. Recently I considered a couple of coach holidays with a well known coach operator. Independently I looked at the reviewsof the hotels booked by the coach company. In each of the holidays (UK) which were of interest to me, the majority of reviews were extremely bad. I'm so relieved that I checked. In the past I've had two coach holidays (different company) and the accommodation was very good. Worth checking, as I had assumed the company in question was also reliable.

Lathyrus Sun 16-Oct-22 16:07:24

If you like walking you can’t beat an HF Festive break. Walkers are such sociable people and the walk every day followed by a meal means it’s not terribly Christmassy.

Gosh I’ve missed them. Best ever was Christmas and New Year in St Ives, Cornwall.

Or if you want to get right away to where there’s no Christmas have a look at Explore.

Barmeyoldbat Sun 16-Oct-22 16:34:14

We use to spend Christmas on an Explore holiday or an Exodus one. I have even been on one on my own and they are very well suited to people on their own

pinkprincess Sun 16-Oct-22 19:42:51

My husband died three days after Christmas nearly three years ago now. Although he had been ill for a long time he always seemed to get over his many hospital stays to be well enough to come home after a few days. His last hospital stay lasted longer and on Christmas Day we were called to say he had only a very short time left.I remained at his bedside until he passed away so Christmas to me has never been the same.
I have a lot of family members, sons grandchildren and great grandchildren fortunately so they help to make it a happy Christmas.I also have sisters around to visit so am fortunate that way, we enjoy each others company and I am thankful also for my friends and my strong religious faith
I feel for all of you in similar circumstances, the memories of our life together celebrating past Christmases especially when our children were little remain.

Mamma66 Sun 16-Oct-22 20:25:04

Have you thought of volunteering? Some community groups put on a Christmas dinner for those who would otherwise be on their own and they always need volunteers to help. Obviously this may not be something you want, or are able to do, but it is an option. I hope that you have a peaceful Christmas ?

pinkprincess Mon 17-Oct-22 20:20:30

Thankyou Mamma66

I am already volunteer on a helping group I get a lot of satisfaction and have many friends through it.
My family visit me a lot as well.
Thank for your kind thoughts.

Wyllow3 Mon 17-Oct-22 20:33:17

I'm not sure If I'll be alone or not, but if I am it will be very nice to have a special thread for the day that is "Real" - not "must be jolly" but simply what we are doing, eating, memories sad or happy, whatever works for us.
(I presume Gransnet isn't closed?)

Aldom Mon 17-Oct-22 20:40:43

Willow3 Gransnet will be here for you and everyone who wants to pop in over Christmas.
Hello Anniebach how are you today? Thinking of you. We know, don't we xxflowers

Ashcombe Mon 17-Oct-22 20:46:21

Wyllow3: it will be open so perhaps you could start a thread like that when you are ready on Christmas Day. The idea appeals to me!

DH and I hope to be in France, if I'm recovered enough from surgery by then, where it's a much quieter experience.

Wyllow3 Mon 17-Oct-22 21:20:38

See what happens.
If I'm here will start or join in a thread which is guaranteed pressurised festive jolliness free.

Annanan Tue 18-Oct-22 11:28:14

Yeah my marriage broke up I volunteered at crisis and continue to do so for several years. I was spending Christmases with hundreds of people who all had a reason for not being with their families at Christmas. I have to say it was great fun and also it felt worthwhile. I am sure that if Christmas is a problem for anyone they need to look outside themselves and see if they can help anyone less fortunate.

granma47 Tue 18-Oct-22 11:35:53

We have met people travelling on their own on Fred Olsen cruises. Solos have their own table and extra care is taken. They have Christmas cruises which, I believe, are very good and even sail from Liverpool as well as the south of England