I think it's time for Lily

Oh, phoenix, I know just how you are feeling tonight. I also know that, whatever decision you take, it will be the right one for you - and for Lily.

Our own dear Monty took to sitting on the stairs during his last days.
Whatever you decide, phoenix, I feel sad for both you and Lily...

So sad for you phoenix I know when it was 'time' for our Ziggy and Jasper we had the vet visit to do the deed. It was less stressful for us and Jasper (Ziggy went to the vets) and was quick and painless but still very very heartbreaking.

phoenix It does not sound much fun for poor Lily herself. You have a hard decision to make there.

I still have the odd moment, like now, she is sitting on the stairs, happy as anything (in her own way) it's so bloody hard.

it is the right thing, isn't it?

Please tell me so, I can't do anything until tomorrow, and even then all I can do is book the appointment. Would need to ask a neighbour to help with transport. So upset, not really like me, usually the one to be the one with the ready quip, funny comment etc.

It's always difficult to make the decision, and I've never got it right but most of the time I've let them go on for longer than I should and then regretted it [if that's any help ].

Our last cat, Norbert went from 'not too bad' to really ill in a couple of hours. Rushed him to the vet where he was seen as an emergency. Vet said there was really little more she could do and left us to make up our minds, whereupon Norbert took a massive fit and died. We were very grateful that he saved us having to take the awful decision but was still very distressing.

I think you know what has to be done, especially as with a new job hopefully in the pipeline you will not be able to monitor her hour by hour.

A horrible dilemma Phoenix. We let our last dog go on too long but they are such a big part of our lives that it is difficult to let go.

phoenix it may help to ask yourself what advice you would give to someone in your shoes. I think you know the answer. (((Hugs)))

It's very hard to make such a decision particularly when at times she's sitting there looking normal - probably the right thing to do though as poor Lily must be confused and frightened

((((Hugs))))

phoenix think of Lily's age, she is not in her first flush of youth. If it is going through your mind that this is the correct thing to do, I think that you have made your own decision. You do not want Lily to suffer. What are Mr. P's feelings?

All the very best, I know from personal experience that it is not easy.

Brave and loving decision- and the right thing to do when you truly love an animal.

Our eldest wanted to be a vet- but working at a friend's practice on Saturdays and holidays, she was truly shocked that so many (and yes, generally older) people- put their animals through awful pain, etc- at the end of their lives, because they just can't let go.

My heart goes to you as I know how hard it is (I am sitting here with a 14 year old dachs and a 16 year old Heinz57 and a 17 year old cat...)

Many thanks for all the good wishes, I haven't phoned the vet yet but I will. Mr P thinks it's the right thing, but when we tried to take her on Christmas Eve (and failed because the road was flooded) he was actually quite relieved that the mission was aborted!

However I must take into account that with a bit of luck I should be starting work again soon, and leaving her in the house alone (there are the other cats, but you know what I mean) wouldn't be fair on her. The wound on the back of my head is now a bit swollen and very tender.

That's what I was thinking last night; if you're going to be away all day you'll never forgive yourself if you come home and find that something has happened to her during the day and you won't know what has happened.

I do feel for you phoenix it's a horrible decision to have to make. I think you will find it a rwlief when you don't have to worry about her anymore.

phoenix that is the hardest call to make, you have to do whats best for Lily

Phoenix I have been there with pets our cat and a budgie.

The cat had been ill for along while but not obviously in pain but I did leave it far too long.
One of my budgie pairs had developed really bad breathing problems and they didn't clear up with antibiotics and I took him to be put down.

The other 10yr old (elderly) budgie Georgie did get very poorly one winter and I thought it was the end for him but recovered on antibiotics, quite surprisingly really. A snotty wheezy budgie is a very sad looking creature.
He was then good for several more months.

He spent his last week chasing his companion madly and raucously around the room but one night ended up on the top of the pelmet obviously looking very sick. I got him into the travel cage covered it up to keep him calm and sat with the cage on my lap until he quietly died.
Georgie went downhill in a few hours after a day having lots of fun doing what he most enjoyed. I suspect heart failure but that was a far better way than being ill for weeks.
It is not an easy thing to do but I think we can all tell when an animal has had enough.

(((hugs)))

As said in PM to another lovely member today, our pets bring us so much joy, but it does hurt to lose them.

it's terrible when you have to play God. But pets usually live on a lot longer than Nature probably intends. Often it's made easier because the animal clearly no longer wants to be here. It sounds as if Liky may have had enough.

"It is not an easy thing to do but I think we can all tell when an animal has had enough"

Nellie that is part of the problem, Lily seems absolutely fine between fits, eats, uses the litter tray (she decided long ago that the outside world was not for her!) comes through to join us in the sitting room in the evening.

Yes, I need to think about what things would be like for her if I was working full time again, but it's the question of what her quality of life is like, and that is hard to judge on todays performance.

It's not an ideal life for a cat sitting halfway up the stairs most of the time, but it's where she has chosen to be, and she seems quite happy there (daft tart)

How do I tell if she has had enough ?

Sorry, I know it seems as if I'm prevaricating, which I suppose I am, but I keep going back to the questions I've asked.

Phoenix - my neighbour asked where our old dog was when he saw me walking the younger dogs. I told him the dog , aged 15, was being treated for various old age things, and at home. My neighbour said 'you'll know when the time is right. Better a week too soon, than a day too late". A couple of nights later I was giving liquid feed/water by syringe and the old dog let it dribble out of his mouth, whilst gazing into my eyes. Ok boy I said. He remains a legend in our family, but I do thank my neighbour for his gentle words. The neighbour also has dogs so understood - sending hugs to you and Lily

My DS has been facing this dilemma on and off for a year now with his dog, my granddog. Today at 10.00 the vet is coming to their house to put him to sleep.

It's very sad