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AIBU to not want to pick up disruptive Grandson from School.

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Usernametaken Fri 18-Nov-22 13:23:09

Hello fellow Grans. Hope someone can give some advice. DH and I have two Grandchildren, a Granddaughter who is nine and a half, she’s an adorable little girl, very affectionate and loves drawing and reading. And giving cuddles.

We also have a Grandson who is six. He never does as he’s told, he’s obsessed with his “Willy”, often getting it out. He’s always talking about bottoms and boobies.

I pick them up from School two days a week. He’s always trying to open car door (have child locks on), opening the car windows, altering the front headrests etc.
Last week he somehow put his dirty feet all over the front seat headrest and I had to take it to be cleaned. It’s only a two year old Vehicle and we don’t want it trashing.

AIBU to not want to pick him up again. Obviously that would mean not picking DGD either.

DS and DDIL both work full time. DDIL’s mum picks the children up on the other days, and surprise surprise DGD behaves with his other Grandparents.

Have tried telling him off, would like to hit him (obviously not hard, but you can’t do that any more).

When he’s with his Parents and does something naughty, they say things like, “No TV for a week”, then an hour later he’s watching it again. Or no treats for a week, then get taken out to a theme park or something similar. Doesn’t seem to be any discipline at all at home.

Any advice would be really appreciated, especially if any of you lovely Ladies have experienced the same sort of thing.

Thank you

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Franbern Sat 19-Nov-22 18:40:45

Small children seem to have an uncanny way of knowing exactly what upsets individual adults the most. Obviously, this 6 year old has found that talking about bums, boobs and willies is what really gets to this g.mother.

Hope the OP is prepared for her darling little g.daughter to become a teenage monster in a very short time in the future. Probaby about the same time as the boy becomes a sweet, charming, loving little boy.

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tapestryfrog Sun 01-Jan-23 22:12:33

You can buy covers for the back of the front seats - we have them and they also have pockets so you can put toys, snacks in for the kids and keeps muddy footprints off the actual car upholstery. Our DGD is 5 and is much the same as your DGS (without the willy problem obviously). Kids that age just seem to find poos, farts etc excruciatingly funny - they grow out of it. I pick her up from school sometimes and she is always hungry so I take snacks. We walk home and if weather and time allow will go to the playground to run off some steam on the way. She is a handful but I adore her. Her little brother so far is a much easier child at 2 and a half so the boy/girl thing doesn't always work it is the opposite way round in our family.

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dragonfly46 Sun 01-Jan-23 22:25:21

Strangely when I was teaching and with my own two I found boys much easier than girls.
What you see is what you get with boys.
We have a gentle granddaughter of 7 and a very boisterous grandson of 4 but they are both gorgeous.

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grandtanteJE65 Mon 02-Jan-23 14:02:27

Have you tried simply ignoring him when he is playing with his willy, or talking about bottoms and boobies?

This is a phase most children go through.

It sounds to me as if your grandson is desperately trying to get attention, and as he can't be good like his big sister, he is being deliberately naughty in the sense of doing what he knows you don't like.

Preventing this kind of behaviour is far, far better than scolding him. Let him play some fairly wild game, outside if possible WITH YOU for twenty minutes or so, after you get in from school, while his sister either sits and draws or reads or joins in.

Then go inside, taking him with you for milk and biscuits or whatever you give them. If willy is taking the air, request he is put back inside pants - then ignore.

In your house, you can make sure that treats are treats for good behaviour if you want, irrespective of what his parents do. How did you treat your own son when he was that age?

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