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Posting on threads to put them down

(110 Posts)
Beswitched Fri 18-Mar-22 08:00:26

Time and time again I see posters coming onto a perfectly clearly titled thread to sourly comment that they have no interest in the subject, or can't understand why anyone would start a thread on the topic, or to rudely tell the OP they need to get a life if this is all they're interested in.

Why do posters do this? It's so bad mannered and unpleasant. Would they walk up to a bunch of people idly chatting at a party and tell them their conversation is boring, and they obviously have nothing else going on in their lives and can they not find something more interesting to chat about?

Do they not see that it is equally rude and odd to voluntarily join in a conversation online for the sole purpose of announcing they've no interest in the matter under discussion.

I do call people out on it at the time, but it's very strange behaviour.

Oldwoman70 Fri 18-Mar-22 08:21:56

I know a couple of people who log in but no longer post simply because of the small minority who do this. We all know the majority of GNs are reasonable and supportive but there do seem to be some who delight in putting people down.

rafichagran Fri 18-Mar-22 08:23:26

I think also it is how people say things, yes, there is a terrible war in Ukraine, yes we all know terrible things happen over her and in the world, but we all get on with our lives, we have different threads like style and beauty which posters contribute too, in RL we discuss the weather, life goes on.
I feel the posters who go on to a thread and say not interested, not a 3rd world problem, or get a life, are rude, as they can ignore the post and not comment. Life goes on and we all talk and write about everyday things. I am not perfect, but some posters feel they have a right to be dismissive.

AGAA4 Fri 18-Mar-22 08:24:50

I have seen this happen and just think it's a waste of time and effort to get involved in a thread you have no interest in. It can disrupt the thread for others who are interested in the discussion so it is rude.

Kim19 Fri 18-Mar-22 08:24:57

I"ve wondered about this myself. Contorted 'power' of anonimity? Think their opinion is important rather than simp!y interesting?

Ladyleftfieldlover Fri 18-Mar-22 08:26:34

Basic rudeness. If I’m not interested in a topic, I simply don’t post. Life is too short. But we all know people who behave like that in the flesh. I just ignore them.

M0nica Fri 18-Mar-22 08:36:15

Uually I think it is a form of virtue signalling, 'You may be intersted in what every one eats for breakfast', for example, 'but I am above such trivial interests'

And the other putdown such people enjoy 'First world problem'

I just feel sorry for such people. If the only enjoyment you can get from life is putting down people, who you do not know, your own life must be pretty desperate.

MerylStreep Fri 18-Mar-22 08:37:18

Beswitched
If you ask for opinions on AIBU, that’s what your going to get.
Some you’ll agree with, some you don’t.
It would be very boring if everyone agreed.

merlotgran Fri 18-Mar-22 08:39:01

It’s playground bully syndrome. Difficult to ignore but standing up for yourself and others simply feeds their feeling of superiority.

I tend to just walk away these days. Life’s too short……

Galaxy Fri 18-Mar-22 08:40:20

Yes I think if you ask for opinions dont be surprised if there are some you dont like.

snowberryZ Fri 18-Mar-22 08:41:41

I think they do it as a way of Putting People In Their Place.
It's nearly always old timers who do this thing of disrupting threads.
Its like a dog p*****g on their territory.
A case of,
"you might think this thread is going well but don't forget that I call the shots around here and I can mess this whole thread up if I want"

Urmstongran Fri 18-Mar-22 08:42:11

I thought AIBU threads are for that reason? Opinions.
Perhaps better to put some topics under ‘Chat’ instead?
?

Redhead56 Fri 18-Mar-22 08:43:53

What a good point Beswitched I started a post about a travel blog which I thought was very interesting. I was criticised the rest of the post purely based on the person presenting the programme. Who people find unpleasant I watched it because it was an interesting travel programme.

If people disliked the presenter so much why did they bother watching it. I actually pick and choose what to post now based on that experience which wasn’t very nice. I also don’t get back to a post when I see nasty remarks people make for whatever reason.

eazybee Fri 18-Mar-22 08:44:52

Caused by an inflated ego combined with a perceived lack of attention.

Beswitched Fri 18-Mar-22 08:45:28

MerylStreep

Beswitched
If you ask for opinions on AIBU, that’s what your going to get.
Some you’ll agree with, some you don’t.
It would be very boring if everyone agreed.

I'm not talking about people giving their opinion though. I'm talking about those who come onto a thread for no other reason than to let everyone know they are not interested in the thread - usually in as rude a tone as possible. I mean, apart from it being ill mannered, why do they bother?

Galaxy Fri 18-Mar-22 08:46:29

Are you talking about the pyjamas thread becaise thats not how I interpreted it.

rafichagran Fri 18-Mar-22 08:52:34

Urmstongran

I thought AIBU threads are for that reason? Opinions.
Perhaps better to put some topics under ‘Chat’ instead?
?

Opinions yes, put downs no. Everyone on Gransnet is equal, and it is about respect. If you are not interested in the post, dont carry on reading and dont post put downs.

Beswitched Fri 18-Mar-22 08:54:01

No I'm not talking about any thread in particular. It's something I notice a lot on here and I have raised it on several threads.

Disagree with the OP by all means, but why just come on to announce you're bored by the topic /have more important things to worry about etc.

If you're not interested in the thread then just ignore it.

Yammy Fri 18-Mar-22 08:56:09

'Manners used to taketh man", but I'm afraid these days people are more likely to tell you what they really think.
Maybe we should respond by asking them what they would like to discuss.
I have worked with people like this who sighed and groaned at any conversation and called us dinosaurs. When confronted and give the chance to talk about they would like to discuss they were usually speechless.They enjoy being negative, how sad.sad

MawtheMerrier Fri 18-Mar-22 08:59:01

I think they used to makyth man !

With respect , as someone who is vaguely uncomfortable with threads which pose what I find intrusive questions, such as personal hygiene, I think I am entitled to say so.
Everybody is different, but on the whole I regard chat threads as an online equivalent of chatting with friends and these are not topics I would expect in our conversation.

Dickens Fri 18-Mar-22 09:02:02

Beswitched

MerylStreep

Beswitched
If you ask for opinions on AIBU, that’s what your going to get.
Some you’ll agree with, some you don’t.
It would be very boring if everyone agreed.

I'm not talking about people giving their opinion though. I'm talking about those who come onto a thread for no other reason than to let everyone know they are not interested in the thread - usually in as rude a tone as possible. I mean, apart from it being ill mannered, why do they bother?

I know what you mean.

On Facebook recently, a topic - clearly of interest to some - and a number of posters making comments along the lines of "who cares?" or "get a life".

I pointed out to one of them that they obviously 'cared' sufficiently to make a comment... and received a torrent of insults. I didn't respond. Such individuals are simply arrogant and ill-mannered and, as such, are probably best ignored. And the fact is, they do care - they care that a subject has been raised that is unimportant in their world and want you to know that they "don't care", because that's their way of telling you that you shouldn't either. If you see what I mean...

Beswitched Fri 18-Mar-22 09:03:48

But you don't have to join in every thread Maw. Just as you don't have to join in every real life convsation.

There's lots of threads on here that deal with subjects that either don't interest me or I find uncomfortable.

But other people are entitled to discuss them without me popping in to make the OP feel bad.

Why should I do that?

M0nica Fri 18-Mar-22 09:05:14

I am with Beswitched. It is not a question of not liking comment that disagrees with OP, but someone who posts, just to put people down.

As I quoted going on a thread to just say 'First world problem'

Galaxy Fri 18-Mar-22 09:08:08

Yes thats a fair point Maw, there are some threads that are started to get people to talk about bodily functions and they do need highlighting, they are usually trolls though so thats probably not what beswitched is talking about.

Beswitched Fri 18-Mar-22 09:16:12

The best way to deal with the Troll threads is to just ignore them.

But this is behaviour I see on all sorts of threads. I was furiously berated by someone recently for posting about some ordinary dilemma because there is a war in Ukraine and I shouldn't be chatting about something so trivial.

That kind of posting, along with the arrogant 'I have better things to worry about' is rude and unpleasant.