I joined an online group for those who have been bereaved. I find it impossible to believe that they all had perfect partners who were paragons of virtue. But so it would seem from the posts.
Am I the only widow whose partner was not perfect; who did things that I find hard to forgive? I know that latterly some of his unacceptable behaviour was illness-induced and those things I can forgive - he did not really know what he was doing. These things were hard to bear.
But even before then, although we were solid as a couple, there were behaviours that caused me distress. And when I look back I realise I could have handled some of these things better - hindsight is a great thing - but too late now to set these right. Am I the only person who finds it hard not to dwell on these things?
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Bereavement
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